Things we learn

  I have a friend, Shawn, who often blogs about family, or her faith-based lifestyle. Quite often her articles are inspiring in one way or another, one of her recent posts about a fellow with Downs, reminded me of someone I knew, and things I learned from him.

 

  When I was a young man, fresh out of high school, I started a business restoring old cars, painting, and doing body work. While much of my work dealt with old cars, we supplemented income by doing insurance work and also sold used cars.  I did some work for a fellow that worked with my dad, and he asked if I needed any help, part time or otherwise. He explained that his adult son, Larry, had been injured in an accident when he was young, and had some learning difficulties. I did need some help, but I was apprehensive about hiring someone that may have special needs, so I agreed to talk to him, and give him a shot anyway.

  Larry was 35 at the time, with no steady employment history, or even a drivers license, but his mother assured me that he would be at work on time every day.  I found out that he had been struck by a car, which left him comatose with a severe head injury, and unexpected to live. This happened when he was about ten, and although he survived, his mental faculties were diminished greatly. He was stuck in the mind of a ten-year-old, with some physical damage as well. The accident left him with a slow, shuffling gait, and a barely functioning left hand and arm, much like a stroke victim with partial paralysis. Larry was very smart, and wanted to be self sufficient, but he was not matured, and lacked many basic skills that would allow him to function on his own. One thing that stood out, was that he had no real concept of time, on an hourly or a daily level, often not knowing what day or month it was. He also could not grasp monetary functions, such as how many quarters the drink machine took.

  As an employee, his record was spotless, he was always the first to arrive, and the last to leave each day, his mother acting as his faithful chauffer. As long as things remained routine, he functioned well, and often, one could forget he was a little different. But things out of the norm upset him, and threw him sometimes, he never became hysterical or unmanageable, just a little upset. He was very much like “the rain man” in that he was predictable, and routine based. As we worked with him, we found that he had many things to offer, and that he could learn new things as he went along.

  When he came to us, he knew nothing of bodywork, or any aspects of shop life, he could not operate even the simplest tool, or crank a car. I tried to use him for meanial tasks, such as sweeping and cleaning the shop, washing cars, or being the shop gopher when someone needed something that was always somewhere else. He was so eager to help, and be useful that the other guys in the shop began taking a shine to him, and using him whenever they needed a hand. We were very careful to keep him away from power tools, or situations that may get him hurt. Over time, he learned tools, and their usages, began doing some sanding, taping, and prep work, and even learned to move cars around the lot quite well. Although we were all skeptical at first, with my shop manager being the most fearful of him messing something up, we learned that he had much more to offer than what appeared on the surface.

  Each day at lunch, he would unfold a paper towel from his lunch sack, laying all of his items on it carefully, with his peanut butter sandwich squarely in the middle. Every day was the same, even down to the sandwich, all he ever ate was peanut butter and jelly- with the crust removed. A shop full of guys can be heathenistic, loud, and unruly at times, but each day as the five of us sat down to eat, Larry would say grace before we dined- it was a must. It was his moment, and at first several of us looked at it as an intrusion, but before long we came to accept it, and embrace it. Before Larry, lunchtime was loud and sometimes hectic, but we soon learned to relax a bit, and enjoy the moment. He loved to tell jokes and riddles, mostly very old and corny ones, and stories that he swore were true, but we knew were made up. He was also a tv and movie savant, he could recall the slightest details from anything he had ever seen, so we often played trivia games, or “stump the Larry”, which he always won.

  Much of Larry’s problems seemed to be centered around his mother not wanting to turn loose, she refused to get him any help, or therapy as an adult, which would have helped him function immensely better. As he worked with us, and developed a life outside the home, he began to improve quite a bit, much of it seemed to be an esteem issue. I think he had been told for so long that he couldn’t do anything, he believed it. His father often stopped by to chat, and see how he was doing, quite impressed that his job duties and pay were increasing. His mother often stopped by to bend my ear about all the crazy notions we were putting in his head, and to demand we treat him like a child- she was an odd bird.

  Larry approached me one day with a crazy idea, he had been studying the DMV handbook, and asked me to take him over to get his learners permit. His father knew, and was okay with it, but his mom didn’t, which made me want to go for it. So, I took him over one afternoon, and he passed the test with flying colors, which meant he could now drive as long as someone was with him. He went with me several times on errands, and became quite good, so, we went back to DMV and he took the drivers test and the road course test. Passing them both handily, he was now a driver.

  Pops came by the shop later that day to pick him up, and sat down in my office and cried tears of joy when Larry showed him his license. He thanked me several times for all we did for him, and said he never thought that day would come. The following morning I was sitting at my desk when Larry and his mom pulled up, I knew there was trouble when she got out, and left him in the car. She cursed me out for doing this horrible thing to her son, and playing such a cruel joke on him, knowing he could never drive in his condition. He had driven, I had ridden with him, and he drove well enough that DMV gave him a license, what joke? The shit really hit the fan when she found out that Pops and I had gone to the auction to purchase a car for Larry.

  I found a Volkswagon Bug, a rare automatic, with air conditioning, all it needed was a paint job and some tires. They are bullet proof, dependable, and safe, the perfect car for him, so we bought it, painted it, and gave it to him for his birthday. All of the fellows in the shop pitched in to help, we worked after hours to get it ready, with him thinking it was just a car for the lot. After the car was finished, and painted Beetle Orange, pops went over and titled it, getting tags.  The car was in the basement of the shop, out of sight, so we sent Larry down to get it, and pull it around front, not knowing it was his car. He had been having fits over the little bug since he first saw it, but did not know we were done with it until he pulled it from the basement. His father bought personalized tags that read “LRYS BUG”.

pt two tomorrow